K5 has an awesome review of Matrix Reloaded (via jeremy) sitting in the submission queue. Hilarious, and insightful (as far as I can tell from not having seen the movie), and no plot spoilers.

Also touches on a few key points on the modern movie going expirence.

  • “five minutes of Pepsi and Jordan Furniture commercials really gets me into the mood for a suckass movie.”

    I wasn’t aware of the effect that commercial had on me when I saw X2 last week, but after Josh pointed it out I decided he was right. They ruin the immersion, the loss of self into a fantasy world. And they piss me off after paying $10 to get in.

  • “Previews had been one of my favorite things about going out to see a movie, until the studios’ marketing departments decided to turn them into mini-films for the attention-span impaired. Instead of a little action, a little skin, a throwaway line (“I’ll be back.”), now there are plot points! And they get resolved! In the fucking trailer! Please shoot me now. “

    Agreed. I love previews, or at least I did, considering them to our culture’s form of haiku. Now they are, as he said, “mini-movies”. Bad ones.

  • Legally Blonde 2 made me want to dig my eyes out with a grapefruit spoon

    Agreed. That might be reason enough to avoid this Summer’s blockbuster, just not to see the preview. And I liked the first Legally Blonde. (guilty pleasures and all that)

All that, plus paying ridiculous sums of money for the privilege is how I found myself declining an invitation to go see Matrix Reloaded due to a vague queasiness I can only describe as “blockbustered out”. Hollywood has already blown my quota for blockbuster bullshit, and the Summer movie season is just starting. (I might forgive them if somehow they could work a little sympathetic magic, and get the temperature in Providence back up into the 40s.)

Oh, the author does post some spoilers down in the comments.

Rosebud was the name of Neo’s sled.

Interesting Correlation

I walked into Matrix having heard no buzz. (I was in the middle of running a dotcom and a little out of touch with the world) I went to see XMen because the word on the street was Patrick Stewart was in it, no one warned me about Ian McKellen. In some ways sequel can never possibly live up to their originals, because they can’t ambush you the same way. Would have been nice if they had tried a little harder though.